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8.8.11

Episode 11: Without A Single Tear


Author's note: Sorry for the late update. Two days, isn't it? I've been occupied with some things these past few days. It's Ramadhan anyway, so you understand right? I'll try my best to keep updating frequently, and sorry for the lack of pictures in this post. Thank you for reading peeps :) I appreciate it so much!

“Dad hasn’t been home for about a week now, hasn’t he?”

Lily’s question from out of the blue after dinner that night surprised her mother. However, she went on with washing the dishes calmly.

“Five days. This has been the longest. I wonder if he’s doing just fine,” Mother continued. There was an obvious tone of worry in her voice. Daisy, on the hand, looked at them both with disapproval.

“This has been the most peaceful five days I ever had. Whether he’s there or not, there’s no difference! Why should we bother thinking about him when he never thinks about us?”

“Daisy!” Lily snapped furiously. Even though what Daisy said was true, but it was their father they were talking about. “Don’t say things like that in front of mother!”

Daisy pulled a sulky face and stormed into the living room which was adjoined to their dining room. Mother let out a deep sigh. “Don’t be mad at her, Lily. She was just voicing out her feelings. It’s been hard for all of us.”

“But mother, I’m worried. What if anything happens to dad? What if he got involved into something worse than those loan sharks? No matter how terrible he is, I don’t want anything bad to happen to him.” Lily uttered slowly.

“Don’t worry dear. If he gets into trouble, he’d always come home. He’ll always come back to us.”

Mother’s reply touched Lily’s heart. Mother’s worry and sadness was never painted clearly on her face, but from her words she knew how her mother suffered inside. Lily finished cleaning the dining table in silence. After saying good night to her mother, Lily went to her room to get ready for bed. When she turned on the lights, she was surprised to find Daisy sitting on her bed, her head hanging gloomily like a mourning person.

“Daisy?” she asked, puzzled. Daisy didn’t move, but Lily noticed her shoulders were jerking slightly and small sobs escaped from her cute little mouth. Lily slowly came near her and touched her little sister’s shoulder.

“Daisy, what’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry for saying all those things. I didn’t mean to hurt mother’s feeling. I was just… I’m sorry Lily.” Daisy said between her sobs. Lily stared towards Daisy’s sad and sorry face. Slowly, she pulled Daisy towards her and hugged her beloved sister tightly.

“There’s nothing to be sorry about. You were just letting go of a lump in your heart. Everybody does that once in a while. Don’t cry, Daisy.” Lily consoled her. Daisy’s sob came out much harder than before. What mother said was true, Lily thought. They all had had a hard time since the past few years. Daisy had all the reasons to be sad.

For a moment, Lily let her sister cry on her shoulders. When her tears were subdued, Lily slowly pushed Daisy’s body and wiped the remaining tears on her cheeks.

“Thanks, Lily. You’re the best.” Daisy muttered with a smile. Lily couldn’t help but laugh. “Hey, my bright-and-positive Daisy is back!” she replied jokingly.

“Sometimes I’m jealous of you. I’ve never seen you shed a single tear. How come you’re so strong?” Daisy asked honestly. Lily moved her gaze towards the window. There was no beautiful view as the window was facing the road-side in front of the apartment. The houses at the other side of the street were mostly already dark. It was a cloudy night too, so there were no stars to be seen. Lily let out a sigh.

“I really don’t know. Maybe it’s because I have mother, and I have you. I don’t know what I would do without you two.” Lily whispered. Now it was Daisy’s turn to give her a hug. They smiled towards each other.

“Now you promise me not to be sad again, okay? We have a concert to attend tomorrow, remember? I don’t want you going there half-heartedly and wasting all the money we spent for the tickets.” Lily reminded. At least that changed the mood a little.

They both said goodnight to each other and Daisy soon left Lily in the room all by herself. Since she was the second and youngest child, Daisy had insisted on sleeping with mother every night. She said she didn’t want mother to feel lonely, but Lily was sure it was because she couldn’t separate from mother yet. Only at times when their father was home, Daisy would come to sleep in Lily’s room.

Lily loved her family so much, no matter how broken it was. She had felt sad so many times before, but she kept telling herself to be strong because she was the eldest and the family relied on her. She remembered how she felt when she first received news about her father being caught selling drugs four years ago. She remembered how mother cried all by herself in the kitchen when she thought nobody listened, and the gloomy-faced Daisy sitting on her bedside, her face tear-stricken from crying all day long. Lily remembered how numb she felt, locking herself in the bathroom and sitting for hours on the toilet seat. The very same day before hearing the shocking news, her first love had introduced her to his very beautiful fiancée who had just come back from Australia for her mid-term break; the fiancée who came driven in an expensive black Mercedes Benz and wore expensive clothing. Lily didn’t know how she had managed all this, but she just did. And without a single tear.

*

To Be Continued...

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